Still in the season of love… We started talking about what makes relationships work. We’ve explored the influence of differences in personality on having a successful relationship or otherwise. We will look more closely at the different personality types, their strengths and weaknesses and also compatibility. Personality is often a big issue but often downplayed unfortunately when investigating important denominators in relationships especially marriage.
Research has it that the month of January records the highest number of break ups in relationships and marriages while the month of February serves as an avenue to rekindle love on all levels. However, we have found out that this is often short-lived as the all lovey-dovey atmosphere fades away in no time. This is exemplified in Mrs. A who after complaining about wanting out of her marriage in January is suddenly optimistic about the upcoming valentine, hoping the season would fix the problem. However, based on previous experience, it was strongly recommended that they undergo proper Couples Therapy to prevent the cycle of relationship hide and seek, which can have negative effect on health, emotion, self-concept, career and other social relationships. Hence, the exploration of the strengths and weaknesses in individual personality characteristics which largely influence the success or failure of relationships and how this knowledge can help create long lasting solutions to seemingly irreconcilable differences.
Personality refers to individual differences in characteristic patterns of thinking, feeling and behaving. Understanding personality is not peculiar to only romantic relationships, it underlies success and failure in other aspects of life as well, but this will be limited to romantic relationships.

There are different classifications of personality but Myer Briggs Type indicators will be explored;
E- EXTRAVERSION VS I- INTROVERSION i.e. source of direction of energy expression

S- SENSING VS N- INTUITION i.e. method by which we perceive information

T- THINKING VS F- FEELING i.e. how we process information

J- JUDGING VS P-PERCIEVING i.e. How we implement information
EXTRAVERSION source and direction of energy mainly from outside world
INTROVERSION source and direction of energy mainly from internal world
SENSING believes information received directly from external world
INTUITION believes information received from intuitive or imaginative thinking
THINKING means one makes decision through logic
FEELING means one makes decisions based on emotions
JUDGING means that the person organizes all of his life events and as a rule, sticks to his plans
PERCEIVING means that one is inclined to improvise and explore alternative options

Every individual has a blend of one from each category of each of the four sets. 16 personality types can be derived as listed below;

ESTJ- the director
ENFJ- the giver
ISTJ- the inspector
INFJ- the advocate
ESFP- the performer
ENTP- the debater
ISTP- the crafter
INFP- the mediator
ESFJ- the caregiver
ENTJ- the commander
ISFJ- the protector
INTJ- the architect
ESTP- the persuader
ENFP- the champion
ISFP- the artist
INTP- the thinker

You are probably trying to identify which group you to already. There are peculiarities to each personality type, their relationship to other personality type as well as compatibility. Indeed, understanding personality is not the end of the story. It includes understanding how to use such personality to bring out the best and that of partners. We believe relationships need full personality assessments before getting in and full battery assessment when there are marital differences. If you or any loved one is currently going through significant marital or relationship distress, do not walk this tortuous road alone – Contact or 081 2827 6962, +234 2291 4084 to book an appointment with a licensed Marriage therapist.